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Monday, April 27, 2009

In life...

I learned that hard work will pay,  But not fulfilling, I learned that concerns are not appreciated, So, do not bother to do it anymore, I learned that lies are very much accepted in most circumstances, Especially when lied to those whom cannot accept the truth, I learned that being frank is something miserable, Not all people like to be frank, I learned that each person have their own way, Why want to interrupt? as long as can go along, I learned that being a friend indeed a way too hard, Because people tends to utilise a friend rather than appreciate one, I learned that I have to continue on learning, Never-ending as long as life is in concern...

Sunday, April 26, 2009

You are you...I am I

Do I need to repeat myself.... That I am not asking everyone to agree with me... I am just trying to inform about what I see and what I believe... And you are under no obligation to say yes, and you have your right to hold on what you believe... I do not mind and I do not care... What I think I supposed to do, I already done... So, I am just being me, myself... If you are not comfortable with me, you are most welcome to go away... I believe in the world, there are other friend that will walk together with me... I am not hoping to see a similiar me, because I know there would not be another me, I am walking with my principles together with the adaptation of other's principles... Theirs might not be the same with me, and so do mine... So, why bother to change their principles...as I can adapt to theirs... I am not going to change mine either...as the same apply to them... In conclusion, you are you, I am I...you are not me, and I am not you...

Thursday, April 23, 2009

sad news

A friend told me a sad news. Her pet just died in the afternoon. I was so surprise to hear that. And I was so sorry to hear that too. I did not know what to react. Her big day also coming around the corner, and this happened out of the blue! I hope she will be alright, even though it will be hard to face initially. I hope that she can be strong enough to break through this obstacle. I hope that she will not mourn for long. I hope that she will be fine in time. This maybe is a sign...A sign of something coming in to replace the lost one. I am not so sure how far the truth of 'No Pain No Gain', but as for me, I indeed faced one huge sadness and lost before I can gain what I have been given today. May she get through all this soon, and soon enough; that she will not suffer from the sorrowness. We know she loves her pet very much... May God bless her and her pets... As for her pet, Rest In Peace Amen.

Saturday, April 18, 2009

disowned

I don't know why, but I have this strange feeling. Not eevn my boss ciao yet, those who are going to take over so overwhelmed by the lab. They seems to be like can't wait to own this lab! WTH!!! Maybe indeed that my boss owned a very well-equipped lab. She just been so thoughtful to the student that she spend the last grant one to purchase all those equipments so that we(the students) do not need to fight for the common equipment. One of the pride is the bench top 5810R refrigerated centrifuge for all type of centrifuge. The changeable rotor makes it so vulnerable for all to use. Everyone seems like so interested in using the bench top. Visitors came in, just to see how great the equipments are! DAMN it, I must admit. I hate to have a feeling that once my boss ciao-ed, the original students won't get the hands to use that equipments anymore! I so dislike when people comes in, especially the soon to take over, brought in people to the new lab, and explore everything that my boss owned. One even asked, if my boss will be taking all out, including the consumable? When I answer she planned to leave it for us-the students, the person was superbly excited--like she is going to inherit all the consumables as well ==". DAMN it, I am really sad to see my boss items to be treated by the person. Some how, this is unavoidable. My boss got to leave, and that's a fact. I hope she will secure a better carrier over there at the new place, and as for me, I hope I can finished this ASAP; so that I won't be seeing those overwhelmed people again. I find it annoying when people not originally owned the lab, suddenly brought in a lot of stranger and asking a lot of question. Say that I am selfish, say that I am solitaire, say that I felt I am easier in my own niche....say whatever that might came across to everyone mind...I don't care. I wanted them to know as well, my boss haven't ciao yet. She will still be here until middle of JUNE. So, don't fucking overwhelmed to take over yet. Before she officially leave, she is still the boss here. And I am still her student. Sigh...having the feeling of disowned is so fucking pathetic. :( : ( : (

Friday, April 10, 2009

My illusion?

I don't know if this was my imagination, I saw wrongly or it was real, or it was something not suppose to be seen. Yesterday, while driving back to hometown after having dinner with my brother at NanDaiMun at NZX; I was quite sure I am in a good condition to drive. We started the journey at around 1930 using the Plus North-South Highway. We pit stopped at the shell petrol station for pumping petrol as well as get some cans of Nescafe Coffee Latte. It was getting dark and darker as the journey goes. Then when reaching one particular spot, I said to my brother that I saw someone near the divider there. He said he did not see, maybe he did not pay attention or notice about it. But as for me, I am so sure I saw someone was there, near the divider, a woman wearing a helmet, with face, and with shadow and the person looks so solid. All I could not understand as in, why at near the divider there. The woman looks like want to cross the road, but that was a highway!? And at that moment, I just mentioned to my brother as in, NOTHING. The my brother as me, if really something; do not say anything now. Just drive and we continue to chit chat. So, there we go...Continued driving until both of us reached Kampar at around 2120. After that, I just planned to forget about the scene and did not mentioned anything. Even until today, I still kept quite about the scene. Well, since I do not plan to tell it out verbally, guess I can blog it. I do not know, if that was real or not. But guess, I really should have tell myself not to say anything when I am driving at night. Then, I guess, things should be better.  After reached home, the hanger of my water bottle torned. I even managed to say to my brother as in, this looks like a bad signal. Well, I do not want to speculate much. Just want to let the scene gone and let it bygone. Am back to hometown for Good Friday and to celebrate the Easter day...  God Bless...

Friday, April 3, 2009

hurt

I don't know why.... It is such a small matter, but I felt hurt.... NOT only me who felt it, some at the surrounding also felt the same.... I don't know how to explain.... That this friend of ours just too over with the attitude.... Too indulged with all pampered treatment.... And now I could not help myself.... But to TREAT this friend a LESSON.... I would like this friend to know.... What had been done from the misbehave and bad attitude.... Really make us sick of it.... Make us pissed off.... And most importantly.... HURT our feelings.... And if only this friend know.... If only.... It is really hurt, dissapointing and the wound carried our heart away.... It HURTS!!!